Everywhere feels crowded, with things,
sounds, smells, bodies, voices and need.
That we could by the whisper of a word
alleviate this world's pain, we would
then pull from under the ruler's feet
the long, golden tapestry that binds them.
We would then pull back the curtain from where
all suffering is crafted.
Your memory breaks into the road leading to my heart
where you reside and it is here that I find you, solemn
and serene. It is here in this final place that you are
finally safe.
Each night I am embattled with wakefulness
pulling at my feet into a brawl.
Each night I become hunter with no compass.
Endlessly trailing memory and reason.
Each night I seek the darkest embrace,
arriving always at a barren space.
And in this wasteland of thought I die
and am born again.
You came into this world through your own door
when the storm had let up. When all the old voices
had died down. Fists first, heart last, -took you
forever to let anybody in. You were not rushing to
to be a pet.
Mother's and mine arms fastened against you before form,
nurturing the toughened shell. Oh how glorious you wear the self.
Little granite goddess of wonder, I was always your shield.
Took every blow and ran back to show you how to dodge the coming years.
You'll get everything you want in life and I'll be watching.
Here or beyond the now, I promise, I'll be watching.
It is early morning and I think of dad.
The sky is dark still but the birds they sing.
The birds awake before we see the flaring sun's face.
And I am here thinking of you father.
You were hurt long before you hurt me.
You were broken long before you broke me.
And the scars we carry form a celestial pattern,
Like planets in the sky arranged with ample space
between each other.
They never fight for light, discord is not their nature.
Father, do you remember?
My shoelaces untied so easily and so you taught me,
tricks to ensure the bond of ties.
You taught me how to make things last,
like the unforgivingness of mother
like the words plastered in the backside of my mind
cast up, in violence uttered.
Some things last forever, yes some things are unforgettable.
Father with your mouth of knowledge and your love of books.
People they have come and left, the birds cry out till the
very sunset. The planets still revolve beyond the ether.
And I am here thinking of you father.
My shoelaces never again parted one another.